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The Truth About Drug Addiction
Let me start by introducing myself. My name is Josh and I’m 24 years old. It all started when I was 12. I first tried marijuana when I was 12 and loved it so much I started smoking it every day.
Around the time I started 10th grade, I started selling marijuana so I could get mine for free and make a few bucks doing it. From there, I started selling more and more. By the time I was gaining two pounds at once, I started using ecstasy and cocaine every day. Then I started selling ecstasy and cocaine along with marijuana, I was 16 at the time.
I made a lot of money doing it and got all the free drugs I ever wanted. At the age of 17, I lived alone with my girlfriend and we both consume a lot. I had so much traffic coming to my trailer, it was crazy. I thought I was going to get caught by the cops, I was so paranoid.
By the time I turned 18 my friend brought in some 60mg morphine pills and I snorted a few, that must have been the worst thing I’ve ever done. I loved it so much, even more than cocaine and ecstasy. So I started spending the money I was earning on morphine and a lot of it. Shortly after, my same friend brought morphine and needles. He was showing me how to inject morphine and he was doing it in front of me, so I tried. The rush it gave me was so amazing I wouldn’t do it any other way.
It didn’t take long to spend the money I was earning selling drugs. I ended up spending all the money I made and didn’t have enough money to buy more drugs to sell so I ended up quitting selling drugs because I couldn’t get myself allow it. I was so addicted to morphine that I couldn’t go a day without, otherwise I would get really sick (drugged). I started trying oxycotine, dilaudid, heroin, valium, ativan, klonopin, fentanyl patches and many more. But morphine was my drug of choice.
When I was 19, my girlfriend and I broke up because of the amount of drugs we use. I ended up losing my job and couldn’t keep a job because if I didn’t have pills I would get sick and call work. So I lost the caravan and ended up going back to live with my parents. My parents didn’t know the extent of my drug use and I wanted it to continue. But they started getting suspicious because I was getting sick all the time. If I didn’t have medicine for the next day, I would get really sick.
I started stealing money from my parents to get drugs. I also stole tools, rings or anything that gave me money to buy drugs. Eventually my parents found out that I was stealing them and using needles daily. I hurt them so much and didn’t even care, which was the saddest thing. So they ended up kicking me out of their house and I ended up living with one of my user buddies.
One night I was using heroin, morphine and ativan together and a lot, the last thing I remember was going to bed. When I woke up I was in jail and I didn’t know why I was there. I found out that I never went to bed, ended up getting in my car and driving, I still don’t know where I was going. But anyway, I had a few other drivers on the road flagging me down for driving 15 mph in the opposite lane. It was around 5 am. The cops eventually found me and my car in a parking lot about 5 miles from where I lived. The police report said I had slurred speech, couldn’t stand up, and looked half dead. So they ended up charging me an OWI
I stayed in jail for two days sleeping most of the time and got bail. At that time my parents found out everything I had taken from them and they were so mad at me for stealing from them and getting in trouble with the law it was so hard on them . But I was still using drugs when I got out of prison. I even had eight drug tests a month and I didn’t care at all, I failed every drug test I took. I ended up having my bail revoked and maxing out that charge, I spent 93 days in jail.
When I got out of prison I tried to stay sober, but it only lasted a month and I started taking morphine again and went back to my old habits. It got worse and worse, I ended up selling my car for the drug money. I started stealing from my parents again even though they let me go back to live with them. And of course they understood and kicked me out again. So I started living with my user buddy again. I still had no job and no money.
At the age of 23, I was still living with my boyfriend and taking morphine every day. I started stealing more and more from stores. And then I was charged with breaking and entering, which is a 10-year felony. So, once again, I was in jail on $50,000 cash bail, so I wasn’t going anywhere.
My first two weeks in prison, I was so sick. We were a loud 30 minute visit every Saturday. And my parents were the only ones who came to visit me after everything I put them through, showed me who my real friends were. The only things you can do in prison are watch TV, play cards and practice. I did them every day. By the time I went to court for sentencing, I had served 60 days in jail. I was sentenced to 6 months in prison with 3 years probation, which is not bad at all. I really wanted to quit drugs this time around and I knew it was going to take a lot of work, I mean I took drugs for 5 years.
So the moment I got out of prison, I put myself in the Dakoske treatment center, which lasted 28 days. Dakoske taught me a lot and helped me a lot. So I did my 28 days there and my parents once again let me move in. Since then, I am clean and I feel good. I have a job, I pay my bills on time, and I almost got my driver’s license back. I go to at least two NA meetings a week. And I can’t tell you how good it feels to have your parents proud of you, it feels good.
Well, this is the story of my life and I hope you learned something from reading it. It shows you that there is hope. I’ve hit rock bottom and I’m coming out of this hole at a breakneck pace. So it’s not too late to stop! If I can do it, then you can do it!
Good luck everyone and hope this helps!
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